Okay so I wrote this at like one in the morning so if this is terrible I'm truly sorry. I had a lot on my mind and I just spilled it out. The concept of this is kind of strange but it makes for a good fictional story, hehe. ;) So enjoy my rant-turned-into-a-fictional-short-story!!
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I found her sitting on the edge of a small cliff, overlooking a lake in the late afternoon. The sun was setting across the horizon, with bright colors painting the sky. The evidence of God's creativity and beauty truly showed.
It wasn't until I sat down next to her that I realized she was crying. What happened? Why was she crying? Seeing her cry was enough for me to feel pain in my chest.
"Are you okay?" I asked quietly.
She looked up, and our eyes met. My heart broke a little more as the pain was evident in the expression on her face. "No," she replied.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I scooted a little closer to her.
"He broke up with me," she said, more tears spilling from her eyes.
I shook my head. Why would anyone break up with her? I've seen every stage of her life, from the moment she was born until this very moment. I've been with her from the beginning, experiencing the happiest and saddest moments of her life. Although she would never know that I was just an angel assigned to look after her, to protect her, to be there for her. God couldn't have given me a better mission with this one. Most angels don't actually appear to the person they're assigned to look after, but this was a special mission from God. To truly help her.. And right now, God must want me to comfort her, to lift her up from this pit that she's in. I can feel it in my heart.
"Why would he do that?" I asked her.
She wiped her eyes. "H-He said that he's too broken to love me like I love him. That I would be better off without him. That letting him go is what I need to do. But how can I do that? I love him. I don't want anyone else. The thought of moving on.. Of letting someone else in... That kills me. Why can't he understand that? Why would he do this to me? After everything we've been through together. He promised me he was in this until the end. He said he loved me too. Why isn't that enough? All I ever did was love him. I don't understand. I let down my walls for him. And now.. I'm just gonna build them back up. I'm too broken to move on."
I took a deep breath. God, give me the right words here.
"You know, you can treat a man like a King, put your entire being into making him happy, love him more than you can express or put into words, and it can still never be enough. I hate telling you that, but it's true. Some people realize how lucky they are, and they just aren't ready for it and they're not ready to commit. You, however, did absolutely nothing wrong. I'm proud of you for loving him like that. But I'm truly sorry that it wasn't returned back to you. Here's what I can promise you though; you're going to make it. You will, with lots of time, move on completely. You will hold your head up and God will mend that broken heart of yours. And eventually, you will find someone else, and you will let down your walls again, and it will be scary. You'll start to love him just as much as you loved this boy who broke your heart, and you will be hesitant and fearful. But here's the great news, this new person, he won't hurt you. In fact, he will love you! And that's when you realize that everything you went through, all the tears and hurt and pain, was worth it. It led you right to the very moment where you realized you never want to kiss anyone else, or love anyone else as much as you love him. Life will be beautiful once again, you'll feel so much love in your heart. God knows the desires in your heart, He knows the perfect guy for you. Let Him lead you to finding just that."
My heart felt hopeful as she smiled at me. I pulled her into a tight hug. She sighed into my chest. "Thank you," she whispered.
"You're welcome," I mumbled into her hair.
I have held her in my arms so many times before, but this is the first time that she's ever been aware of it. She didn't know of my true identity, and I liked it that way. Comforting her was something I have grown used to, and nothing ever made me feel more complete than doing exactly what God made me for.
"So how do I let go?" she asked as she pulled away.
"One day at a time. Know you deserve so much more for yourself. I'm not saying it's going to be easy, but you're only hurting yourself when you don't let go. At times it will be unbearable, but God is close to the broken-hearted. I believe in you," I said, placing my hand on hers.
"I can already tell it will be a rough road. Honestly, I just want to know I'm special enough to not let go of, you know? And clearly he didn't think I was that special. I want someone who won't give up on me. I won't stop searching until I find that," she said.
"You're only looking up. That's what I like to see. Now, let's get you home because it's almost dark." I said, standing up. The stars were slowly beginning to shine in the sky.
"Alright," she said as I helped her up.
I smiled to myself as we walked back. We did it again, God. Thank you for being the loving Father you are. Thank you for using me once again for Your beautiful plan...
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